god bless qtpie
|—||tumblr user sheepuchan (via ziakid)|
I’m so stressed out right now I don’t want any of this someone come help me pretend I’m a good person
John Mulaney | The Salt & Pepper Diner
THE BEST JOKE IN EXISTENCE
GOD I JUST TOLD SOMEONE ABOUT THIS STORY
This is one of the best pieces of comedy that I have ever had the pleasure of witnessing. I love this. I have been looking for this online for awhile.
It’s going le down
I’m yelling le McTimber
The Screamapillar is easily identified by its constant screaming - it even screams in its sleep. The Screamapillar is the favorite food of everything, is sexually attracted to fire, and needs constant reassurance or it will die.
nothing feels better than winning monopoly. not love. not sex. not free pizza. nothing
I’m sorry, have you tried pizza…?
yes and it doesn’t compare to owning half the board and watching the light die from your friends eyes as you take their money and feel your friendship slowly deteriorate
i like you
It’s a cool place, and they say it gets harder
You’re bundled up now, wait ‘til you get better
this is the best smash up yet
Great news, Smash Mouth posted a link to this on their facebook and twitter.
this is now eggfficially a Smash Mouth sanctioned remix
THIS IS SO GREAT!?